FiNdInG hOpE

Cold is Relative

2012-01-20T13:36:00.001-09:00

In the morning on my way to work it warmed up quite a bit! 0 degrees.

But by the time I was on my way home from Bible study that night it was back to those frigid temps!

It is crazy how anything about 0 degrees can actually feel rather warm

after having a couple of weeks of below 0 temperatures!

-13 Degrees to 82 Degrees!

2012-01-14T16:43:00.000-09:00

Matthew and I went to Hawaii on January 2 and spent 10 days there!! What a perfect vacation. We could not have asked for a better vacation. We got to spend 10 straight days hanging out. Which in itself is AMAZING. But on top of that...we got to leave Alaska's -13 degree temp to go to sunny, beautiful, 80 degree weather in Maui!!!

We got to do a little snorkeling and saw lots of fish, coral and some sea turtles!

We also drove about half of the road to Hana. Along the way we saw lots of beautiful waterfalls.

We went to the North Shore and to Jaws beach to watch the surfers. So cool. I would be scared to death to even go out in those waves. It was really amazing to watch!

The pictures do not even do the surfers justice.

We also went on a kayaking trip! I had never been kayaking before, and have to say that I loved it. We had so much fun. While we out on the water we got to see 6-7 beluga whales off in the distance. AND then, all of the sudden a huge whale surfaced about 10 feet from our kayak!!! I was so scared. I was shaking. I didn't even get a picture of it because I was soooo scared. Matt was just laughing at me, because I could not stop shaking. It was an incredible experience and an amazing display of God's creation.

We also rented scooters one day and drove all over the island :) And, we went and watched the Hyundai PGA Tournament of champions. So fun. We had never been to a PGA tournament before. If we ever have the opportunity to go to one again we absolutely will because it was sooo fun!!

Plus, we spent LOTS of time laying on the beach or at the pool reading our new Nooks :)

We also went on a doors off helicopter tour of the island. Gorgeous!

And one of the highlights of the trips for Matthew was visiting the lavender gardens! Matt loves lavender! So he had a blast walking around the gardens and tasting the teas and foods made from lavender :)

This is the lanai at our condo where we sat and ate breakfast every morning.

Ahhhhh, again. It was a fabulous vacation. We had a great time with each other. And it was a nice change from Alaska (even though we go love the cold in Alaska!). We are so blessed to have been able to take this vacation.

Christmas Eve to the New Year

2012-01-02T16:18:00.000-09:00

On Christmas Eve we had a few of our friends from church over to work on a 1500 piece puzzle, eat dessert and hang out. It was nice for all of us to get to hang out with friends (especially those of us who are very far from our families)!

Matt and I had a very relaxing Christmas Day. We had gotten each other Nooks for Christmas, so we spent the day hanging out at the house and reading mostly!

Matt doing a little snow shoveling in his shorts :)

For New Year's we hosted the first annual Puzzleoff!! We bought three puzzles, had some friends over, divided into three groups and raced to see who could finish the puzzle first (and we had prizes for the winners). I have to say I believe this was a hit and will probably become a tradition in the Cornett household!

Jen, Ryan, Cameronn, Emily and John got first place!

Sarah, Devin, Tami, Kate and Aaron got second place.

Sadly our team got third, but we had a blast!

Marianke, Courtney, Eli, Matt, me and Aiden :)

I got to hold Aiden a lot while doing the puzzle, which was fun!

The guys bought a few fireworks and put on a little show for us afterwards!

We had a great time bringing in the new year with friends!!

Our driveway is notoriously difficult to get up and down! So, the next day, Jen slid down the driveway into the snowbank at the bottom of the driveway. Thankfully it wasn't stuck too bad. They managed to get it out with a few snow shovels!

New Year's Day was a gorgeous day! It was COLD, but pretty clear and crisp. Beautiful.

It was a good start to the New Year. Matt and I are looking forward to what God has in store for us this year. He has taught us so much through many different difficult, sad, and joyous situations and we are anxious to see where He will take us this next year as we are getting out of the military in about 10 months!

Got Snow?

2011-12-23T14:06:00.001-09:00

Over the last few weeks we have been thinking we might not get to have a white Christmas. I know. In Alaska, we were concerned about this??! But it's true. It has been snowing and then the next day getting really warm (high 30's, low 40's) and getting super windy and blowing/melting all the snow away! I was always so disappointed to see the snow go. Not only because I like having snow around, but also because I don't like the wind and everything being melty all the time made for not so great road conditions.

I love the snow! Today we woke up to LOTS of snow. We got at least a foot at our house last night. So, today I am listening to Christmas music, baking bread, making maple-pumpkin cheese cake, cinnamon rolls and other goodies for our Christmas Eve Party and to take with me to work in the morning.

This is a picture of me and Matt on our porch. Just a little accumulation :)

Having a little snow ball fight! The snow wasn't the greatest for making snow balls though...it was a little dry!

Look how much snow is on top of our mailboxes!! Crazy.

I love how our house looks all covered in snow

Another nice thing about the snow (besides it putting me in a great mood because I love it!) is that you don't even need a refrigerater :) Just keep your milk in a little snow.

Remembering to Have Hope

2011-12-21T11:07:00.002-09:00

I was just talking to Matt, Devin and Sarah about this the other night. The fact that it feels like Tyler is getting further and further away. I am growing up. I am now 28 years old and I was 23 when he died. He will forever be 19 years old. He won't ever get older. When my nieces and nephews grow up and are 19 years old....Tyler will still be 19 as well. It is a very strange thing. And, if makes me miss him so much, because without new memories to add to the mix, it feels like he is slipping away.

He was such a godly man who wanted to share Christ's love. He especially wanted to share Christ's love with young kids. He wanted to be a teacher/coach so that he could impact young kids for Christ. Don't get me wrong, he had his flaws. But, Tyler was one of the best men I've ever known. He had a huge heart and a ready smile. He was kind and compassionate. And he had a very easy and natural sense of humor that made almost anyone laugh. I miss him. I rejoice that he is in heaven because he knew Jesus Christ as his savior.

I recently listened to a podcast by Paul David Tripp through the Village Church website. It was a sermon on Isaiah 59 and hope. Two things that he said that really impacted me were, "hope is found through the door of hopelessness" and "when you give up on horizontal hope, then you're ready to find real hope", which is a hope in Jesus Christ. He talked about how we attempt to place our hope horizontally, in people and in things of this earth. But those things will ALWAYS let us down at one time or another. But hope comes when we realize that we are sinful and we need Jesus Christ, and when we place our hope, faith and trust in Him. I am so thankful that I have this hope.

Boarding and Sauerkraut

2011-12-18T22:16:00.002-09:00

This weekend Matt and I went snowboarding for the first time this season. We went with a few people that Matt works with and with our friend Ryan. And, I am now soooo sore from head to toe! I took a pretty major wipe out (I wear a helmet...so no major damage), and now my muscles feel similar to having been in a car accident. But, the soreness was all worth the boarding! :)

After boarding we went over to Ryan and Jen's house to hang out and to eat Jen's amazing pork and sauerkraut! I hadn't had pork and sauerkraut until two New Years Eve's ago when Jen made it, and since then I have begged her to make it more often. I haven't braved it and attempted to make it myself yet, but I will definitely have to at some point.

Matt and Hailey getting a little cuddle time :)

Chicken Tacos

2011-12-06T22:30:00.001-09:00

Matt and I went over to Devin and Sarah's house to eat tonight. They made chicken tacos. They were delicious. Maybe Devin should open a restaurant :)

Georgia Football

2011-12-05T01:05:00.001-09:00

On Saturday, we had a few people over to watch the GA vs LSU game. We knew that LSU was the better team, but we were hoping for an upset. GA got out hopes up in the first half...but just couldn't pull it out in the second half. But it was fun to have people over and cheer for GA anyway!

The Nutcracker

2011-12-01T19:02:00.001-09:00

On Sunday Devin, Sarah, Matt and I went to see "The Nutcracker". I had never seen it before. I didn't even know what it was about. I was so excited. Devin was not excited at all! But he was a good sport for his wife! I ended up being a little disappointed in the show. I mean, it was good. But it wasn't as great as I thought that it would be! We had a lot of fun even though the show wasn't as wonderful as we expected :)

I didn't get a picture of Matt and me because Matt had gone to warm up the car for us :) Such a sweetheart.

Caramel Bread

2011-11-30T22:18:00.001-09:00

The other day Matthew went to a game night at a friend's house. He came home raving about this caramel bread that he ate while there. Since then I have been wanting to attempt to make some. Today I finally did. It turned out delicious. Yuummmm! I had no idea I liked caramel so much! After making this recipe I noticed a couple of things that needed to be modified. So below is the modified recipe.

Ingredients

DOUGH
7 1/2 oz. water
1 egg
3 cups bread flour
4 tbsp. sugar
3 tbsp. powdered milk
1 1/2 tsp. salt
5 tbsp. butter
2 tsp. rapid-rising yeast

CARAMEL
3/4 stick margarine
3/4 cup brown sugar
3/4 cup vanilla ice cream
TOPPING
2 tbsp. butter
Cinnamon
1/2 cup brown sugar

Instructions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place all dough ingredients in bread machine in order given. Set on "Dough" setting and turn on machine.
Make caramel: Melt 1 stick of margarine and add 1 cup of brown sugar and 1 cup of vanilla ice cream in a saucepan. Bring to a boil and boil for a couple of minutes. Remove from stove and set aside.
When machine has finished cycling, remove dough from pan, place on lightly floured surface. Pat dough into a rectangle, spread with 2 tbsp butter and sprinkle lightly with cinnamon. Crumble about 1/2 cup brown sugar all over. Roll up dough and place loaf into lightly greased loaf pan.
Let them raise until doubled, about 45 minutes or so. Bake for approximately 20 to 25 minutes. Remove bread from oven and pour caramel over bread. Bake additional 20 to 25 minutes, or until golden brown.

Hope It Doesn't Cave

2011-11-30T22:01:00.001-09:00

We have gotten sooo much snow this year already. It has been lovely.

Hopefully our deck doesn't cave in from all of this snow :)

Meeting Orson/Thanksgiving in GA

2011-11-27T21:54:00.001-09:00

mini Thanksmas in Texas

2011-11-27T21:34:00.001-09:00

After going to Phoenix, we flew to Dallas to see my family. Gini was coaching a basketball tournament there, so we decided to meet up there so that we could see her as much as possible between games and such.

We got to meet our precious new nephew, Trey! Isn't he a chunk? Adorable! And it was so fun to see how much Will and Levi love being older brothers to this little guy :)

Shelley just loves group hugs.

Matthew and I got to open our Thanksmas presents early :)

Peyton Jo and Ben enjoying a little time in the flower pot.

I love Peyton's expression in the pictures below.

She looks a tad perplexed that Ben is in the flower pot with her :)

Colton and Nate spent a little time hanging out in the linen closet. They had a blast!

Peyton Jo and her new cut and tie blanket from her Aunt Sarah Jo :)

We had a wonderful visit in Texas! I am so thankful that we were able to go and got to see everyone while we were there. We are so blessed.

It Doesn't Stop Here

2011-11-22T09:43:00.001-09:00

I remember one of the hardest things to deal with after Tyler's death was going back to "normal" life. It felt like I was in some way betraying him by doing the mundane tasks of life.

Matthew and I spent time with Devin and Sarah and their family in Phoenix. We went to the balloon release that we held in Logan's honor and attended the memorial service as well. There were so many people that attended both. People who loved Logan and wanted to be there to support and love his family during this time. It was incredible to see how Logan's family was/is choosing to rely on God during this time. But now, as they each must go back to doing the everyday tasks that life requires...now is when they need even more support than ever. They need people to talk about Logan. They need people to ask them how they are doing. They need people to be willing to cry with them. They need people to talk about it even when it is hard to talk about. They need people to be praying for them. They need people to remind them of God's faithfulness. Now, as they go on with life, is the time that they need the most support.

Here are a few pictures from our time in Arizona.

I don't know what the boys were doing here. But while we were there, we spent time looking through pictures of Logan. It was fun to laugh and cry as we talked and heard stories of Logan's life.

On Saturday night a friend of Logan's hosted a balloon release. We all got balloons and wrote a note and attached it to the balloon.

Christian, one of Logan and Devin's nephews, celebrated his 1st birthday while we were there.

Christian enjoying some watermelon!

Sarah and her sweet sister, Melissa.

That adorable belly!!! Can't wait to meet little PG.

Giving Travis a hard time :)

We were so blessed by this family during our time there. Our prayers will continue to be with them as we know that this is only the beginning of the grieving process.

"And they sat with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his suffering was very great." ~Job 2:13

How Do You Comprehend?

2011-11-09T12:46:00.000-09:00

Last night my friends, Devin and Sarah, experienced a tragedy that I hoped they would never have to go through. Devin's 19 year old brother, Logan, was killed in a motorcycle accident. They are relying on God during this time and are aware that God is sovereign and that God will provide for their every need during this time. But, that does not take away or change the great pain that comes from a loss that is so great. Please keep them in your prayers.

Here are a few pictures that I had of Logan.

"I was pushed back and about to fall,

but the Lord helped me.

The Lord is my strength and my defense;

he has become my salvation." ~Psalm 118:13-14

"For no one is cast off by the Lord forever.

Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,

so great is his unfailing love.

For he does not willingly bring affliction

or grief to anyone....

Who can speak and have it happen

if the Lord has not decreed it?

Is it not from the mouth of the Most High

that both calamities and good things come?

....I called on your name, LORD,

from the depths of the pit.

You heard my plea: “Do not close your ears

to my cry for relief.”

You came near when I called you,

and you said, “Do not fear.” ~Lamentations 3

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." ~Revelation 21:4

Photography...for FUN!

2011-11-08T17:16:00.001-09:00

For about a year and a half I had been taking pictures. I was being paid to do this. I would take family, maternity, newborn, engagement, and senior photos. Sarah was helping me on many of these photo shoots. It was fun for a while...but I think that I just got too busy this summer. Or something about being paid to do it made me put too much stress on myself to get the perfect pictures. So, I got burned out and am now taking a break and taking pictures just for fun to remind myself that I do LOVE to take pictures....I just don't think that I want to do it professionally. Maybe I am too much of a perfectionist and want it to be perfect, so when they are not I am frustrated. So, maybe someday I'll consider doing it again. But for now, I am just having fun taking pictures for fun :)

Chicken Curry

2011-11-07T20:53:00.000-09:00

We have found that we thoroughly enjoy some Thai food! The other night I made Thai Chicken Curry that turned out fantastic. I didn't ever eat curry growing up because Mama doesn't really like curry, therefore she didn't make it that often. Actually I don't remember her ever making it :) But, my memory could be flawed! Anyway. I made this recipe up, and Matthew and I both loved it!

Thai Chicken Curry

1/2 bag grilled & ready frozen chicken breast strips

1 onion, chopped

1 pepper, chopped (I used an orange one)

1/2 bag frozen broccoli

1/4 tsp chili powder

1/4 tsp red pepper (or as much as you want depending on how spicy you like it)

1 1/2 tsp yellow curry powder

1/4 tsp basil

1/4 tsp garlic

1/2 tsp ginger

1 14 oz can coconut milk

3 Tbsp sugar

salt to taste

Add all ingredients at one time to large skillet. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low-medium, cover and let simmer for about 45 minutes, stirring occasionally. Allow to sit and cool for about 10 minutes. Serve over white rice.

Have I Told You Lately....

2011-11-06T22:05:00.002-09:00

....That I LOVE the snow!!

One day sooooon, Matthew and I are going to go out in the snow and take some pictures together (and somewhere other than our front yard) :) But until then. here are a few more pictures. We got 4-5 inches of fresh snow last night. It was such a lovely surprise to wake up to!

Hosea

2011-11-05T21:49:00.000-08:00

Hosea is a book that I always seem to go back to when I am reading scripture. I think that it is because I seem to identify so well with it. God wants to be my provider, my comforter, my protector, my joy. However, I chase after what I want. I chase after what makes me comfortable. I chase after what makes me happy for that moment (or at least what I think will make me happy for that moment). I chase after what is easiest. Those are the things that I want. So often, I want those things more than I want what God wants for my life. I know that in desiring those things rather than what God wants, I am attempting to limit God's power in my life and in the end will be far less happy, content, and joyful. I know that what God wants for me and what God is taking me through, will in the end produce so much more joy and contentment in my life. And yet, like in Hosea, I continue to prostitute myself out to these earthly and fleshly desires, rather than trusting God to romance me and love me and provide for me.

"Sow for yourselves righteousness, reap the fruit of unfailing love, and break your unplowed ground; for it is time to seek the Lord until he comes and showers righteousness on you. But you have planted wickedness, you have reaped evil, you have eaten the fruit of deception. Because you have depended on your own strength and on your many warriors." ~Hosea 10-12-13

If only I would rely God's strength in my life every day. If only I would stop allowing the deceiver to convince me that I would be far more happy if life were easier. It is a daily struggle. It is not something that I foresee going away over night. But I do pray that the desires of my heart will begin to reflect what God desires for me. And that I will trust God more and know that this is what is best for me, even when it may not seem like it.

Struggles like this always make me miss Tyler so much. I wonder what he would say to me. I wonder what he would do. I wonder. But, I am also thankful that his battle is over. I am thankful that he is not having to deal with any pain or sorrow. I am thankful that he sheds no more tears. I am thankful that the struggles of this earth are so small in light of the glory of God. But. I still miss him. And I still wish I could get a big hug from him. And I wish that he was here to make me laugh.....even if it was at a joke that he had already told....

We Are Here

2011-11-03T20:35:00.003-08:00

We had out first day of snow on October 26. Ahhh, love it!

It just makes everything look so perfect and peaceful!

I was recently reading a blog that a friend recommended to me. It is written by a girl who has had five miscarriages. She has several medical issues that seem to be continually causing these miscarriages. It will absolutely be a miracle of God if/when she has a healthy pregnancy. In one of her recent blogs she was talking about being content in the place that you are. It is amazing that no matter how many times I hear this, I am constantly falling short and going back to being discontent and frustrated. Often, I even feel angry. I find that I am angry with God. And angry with the insensitive people around me. I know in my head that no one around me intends to be insensitive. In fact, the people around me are grieving with me and Matthew, and only want to encourage us. And yet, I have my feelings sitting on a 10 foot stick, just waiting for people to knock them off.

Don't get me wrong. I have an abundance to be thankful for! Matt is an amazing husband. I could not ask for anyone better. I have a very loving and supportive family. I have a roof over my head. I have a job that I actually enjoy a lot. I have not gone hungry for a single meal in my entire life. I have clean water to drink anytime I want. I have a wonderful group of friends. So, really, in all reality, this one thing of wanting to be pregnant and have a baby is the only thing that I do not have. Therefore, why I am not just thankful and contect in that?

A reminder of my need for contentment is constantly needed. God has Matthew and me exactly where we need to be. Even though this place that we are in is very difficult to deal with. We are where God intends us to be and going through exactly what God has planned for us. Everything that we are enduring is because God has a purpose in it. He has planned for us to go through this and to experience this. He has planned this for us to prepare us for our future....and whatever that may bring.

We Went to the Chapel and We Got Married :)

2011-11-03T20:10:00.000-08:00

Since our third anniversary just passed I thought that I would share how Matthew and I met.

Be ware. This is LONG!

On Sunday, December 2, 2007 I was walking from my car into the University Medical Center at Lubbock emergency room to start my 12 hour shift. My phone rang and it was my sister, Terah calling. She took a couple of minutes to chat and small talk. And then she asked, “So, when is you next weekend off?” I told her that I was off the coming weekend. And she asked if I wanted to come see her in Phoenix, AZ that weekend. I had just seen her a couple of weeks before at Thanksgiving and I was about to see her at Christmas again, so I thought this an odd request. But, her husband Nate had been in Iraq for 7 months already and still had 5 months to go, so I thought maybe she was just lonely. So I asked why she wanted me to come visit. She then told me that she met a guy that she thought I should meet. I think I literally rolled my eyes at this, even though she couldn’t see me. She told me all that she knew about him, which wasn’t very much because she had just met him a couple of hours before this. So, I told her that airline tickets would be really expensive only 5 days in advance and so I didn’t think I would come. She insisted and said that she would let me use one of her free Southwest tickets because she really wanted me to come meet this guy. So, I told her she could look for tickets for me and that I would call her the next day when I got off work.

We ended up not talking until Tuesday. And when we did talk, she didn’t mention this guy named Matt again. She just talked about me coming to visit. In fact, all week she didn’t talk about him again. So, when I left on Friday to fly to Phoenix with my little sister, Cori, I wasn’t even sure if I was going to met this guy while I was there. But I was okay with that because I was skeptical anyway. I was okay with just a weekend visit to see Terah. When we arrived Friday afternoon we went straight to eat lunch with one of Terah’s friends, Elana. Elana is the friend that introduced Matt and Terah and she was so excited to meet me because she had very high regards to Matt and really liked Terah a lot, so she was excited about the possibility of Matt and I meeting. So, over lunch the plans were made for Elana and her husband Josh to come over to Terah’s house on Saturday night for S’mores in the backyard and they were to bring Matt with them. At this point I had no idea if Matt even really knew that he was coming to meet me or not. Saturday night rolled around and I started to get butterflies of nervousness in my stomach. I was still very skeptical because I didn’t think that it would be possible for anything to actually happen with Matt and me. I mean, what were the chances of us meeting and both liking each other and then on top of that, we lived 900 miles from each other! I owned a house and had a great job in Texas and he was in the Air Force. So, even though I was nervous, I really didn’t think that it would come to anything.

Around 9:30 on Saturday night the three of them finally arrived at Terah’s house. Matt walked in and he didn’t look anything like what I had pictured in my head, but I was definitely immediately attracted to him. We all talked for a few minutes in the kitchen and then we were moving out to the backyard. When we were walking out the door Matt got to the door first and then stopped and let me walk out first. Even though this was a small thing, at that moment I began having this small hope….”maybe”. We spent a couple hours all hanging out talking and laughing around the fire. Terah and Elana provided many opportunities to bring about conversation between Matt and I. And Terah even had me making fun of Matt within about 30 minutes of meeting him. If you know me at all, that fact that I was evening talking was a miracle and the fact that I was already making fun of him…now that was pretty much unbelievable. Terah did a great job of getting us talking. And since Matt had to play with the worship team the next morning Terah somehow managed to convince Matt and I that I needed to make Matt breakfast burritos in the morning and bring them to church for him. And then a little later Terah, Josh, Elana, and Cori all of the sudden disappeared and Matt and I found ourselves sitting by the fire talking. We talked until all the firewood was burned and it was way too cold to continue to sit outside. At about 2:15am we went inside, we rather awkwardly said goodnight and Matt took a two hour nap in Terah’s guest bedroom and then he had to get up to drive all the way from Surprise to Buckeye to get his jimbay and then head to church for worship practice.

So, Terah woke me up early enough the next morning to make burritos for Matt. I was very nervous to take him the burritos, but Terah made me. When we arrived at church about 15 minutes early Terah insisted that I walk to the front of church where the worship team was setting up for second service and deliver the burritos. Matt ate them and I stood awkwardly there watching him eat them trying to come up with something to say. During the service I was very distracted and was convinced that I had embarrassed Matt by bringing him breakfast and that I probably wouldn’t hear from him. After church we went to lunch at Matt’s favorite restaurant, Chipotle. All during lunch I was very impressed with Matt and his maturity and how he could be serious and have normal conversations with adults, this was impressive because most of the guys I knew that were around my age were unable to do this! After lunch Terah insisted that we all go back to her house and eat cookies and hang out until Cori and I had to leave for the airport. She quickly claimed that Cori and Josh and Elana’s kids were riding with her so there would not be room for me in her car and she asked Matt to let me ride with him. When we got in his truck and he started the motor, classical music was playing. He asked me if I liked classical music and I immediately responded that I did not…unless I was trying to fall asleep! He changed the station for me, but said that he liked classical music a lot. Even though I didn’t like it was impressed that a guy his age was willing to admit that he loved classical music. We hung out for about an hour at Terah’s and lost track of time. All of the sudden Terah and I realized that Cori and I were going to be late for our flight. So, we quickly packed and threw our bags in the car. All of use stood in the entry way of Terah’s house saying bye. Matt and I barely even said an awkward goodbye. As we were driving to the airport I realized I didn’t even know what Matt’s last name was…and Terah didn’t either. So, she called Elana and she told us that his last name was Cornett.

As soon as I arrived home that night I got online to check my email so that I could show Gini and Shelley the picture of Matt that Terah had so slyly taken for me. Gini and Shelley fully agreed that he was a keeper in the looks department. On Wednesday I talked to Terah. We talked about the fact that Matt didn’t even have my phone number so there was no way he could call me. But even despite that I told Terah, “I think…I mean…I don’t know…but I really think…I think that he may…I mean…I’m not sure…but I think that me might be….” and Terah interrupted and said, “the one”. I was so shocked with myself. I had spent a total about about 6 or 8 hours with this guy, he didn’t have my phone number, he lived in another state and I was still thinking that he might be the one that I was going to marry. What was I thinking?! Terah devised a plan and said that she and Elana would take care of Matt getting my phone number. Elana gave him my number on Friday night and I was very anxious to see if he called or not. At that point I had no idea if he even liked me. I was being a girl and over analyzing everything! Shocker, I know.

On Saturday afternoon I was at Gini’s basketball game in Lubbock with nearly my whole family. My phone rang and it was a Georgia phone number. I am sure that I turned bright red and my whole family knew that it was probably Matthew calling. We talked that day and I told him that I was leaving for family ski trip on Monday. At the end of the conversation he said, “Well, I won’t call and interrupt your family time this week, but you can call me anytime. I’d love to hear from you.” And that was just the encouragement I needed. On Monday we arrived in Denver, CO. We were at Walmart buying all the food we needed for the week on the ski slopes. My sisters convinced me that I should call him today because I might not have service up in the mountains and I needed to make sure he knew that I wanted to talk to him too. So, I called him and left him a message. He called me back later that night (we did have cell service at our condo). We ended up talking everyday while I was on Colorado. On Thursday night after we finished talking I went upstairs and Whitney, Terah, Gini and Shelley were still awake and I was beaming and told them that I was going to marry him. That night in our conversation he was already talking about coming to Muleshoe to meet my family.

Than on Friday we were skiing and I had a major wipe out (one that I still have no memory of). I was unconscious for a time and then was confused and disoriented for about 30-45 minutes. During that time Heather was trying to get me to remember things and trying to orient me, so she asked me, “What’s your boyfriend’s name?” I thought about it and was thinking in my head that Heather would not ask me this question unless I had a boyfriend, but I could not think of one. I started crying at this point because I couldn‘t remember. After a while it all started coming back to me, thankfully : )

Over the next few weeks Matthew and I talked nearly everyday for several hours. Matt kept asking me when he would get to see me again and we made plans for me to visit him at the end of January. On January 19, about two weeks before I was supposed to go to AZ to see him, we were talking. Matthew knew about my track record of never dating anyone for more than about 5-6 weeks, usually more like 3 weeks…. Since it had been six weeks since we met and we were still talking, he asked me if we were “going steady”. I laughed and told him, “for sure”. At that point we had already talked about marriage a little... And I had already told him that I was willing to move to Arizona if it came to that. After I went to visit him in January we were fairly certain that we wanted to get married. He surprised me the second week in February for Valentine’s Day and drove 12 hours, through the snow in New Mexico, to Texas to see me! That weekend he got to briefly meet my parents, Gini, Shelley and Ben. After he left my dad called me and I asked him what he thought about Matthew. He was kind of quiet, said that he liked him, but he didn’t really say much. There was a silence and then he asked me, “do you really want to know what I think”? At that point I was thinking in my head, “oh my goodness, he didn’t like him. What on earth didn’t he like, I thought it went really well“. But I told him, yes that I did really want to know what he thought. His voice kind of cracked and I could hear tears in it, and he said, “I think that Matthew is an answer to Tyler and all of prayers”. I was shocked that Papa would say something that bold, but I was also very relieved because I completely agreed. That weekend was also the weekend that Matthew told me that he loved me. Matthew came for the official “meet the entire, huge sheets family weekend” the last week in February. And while he was there that weekend we decided to get married in October.

We continued to talk on the phone, I began trying to sell my house, and began looking for a job in Phoenix. We decided we probably shouldn’t get engaged until after I met his family, and we made plans to go to Georgia to meet his family in June. During the next few months we spent a lot of money on airline tickets and got to see each other almost every other weekend. Then, on May 16 my family helped me pack my entire house and load a Uhaul trailer and Matt flew down and helped Shelley, Ben and I drive the Uhaul to Phoenix, where I moved in with Nate and Terah. Matt and I went to North Carolina the first week in June and met his brother and sister-in-law, then we drove down to Georgia with his brother John and met his parents, aunt, and grandma. Even though we knew we were getting married I was convinced that Matthew did not have a ring yet, and that we would not officially get engaged until after I got back from Zimbabwe at the end of July. But one day while we were there in Georgia (June 10) Matt took me hiking. We spent the day hiking and taking pictures and had a picnic lunch that Matt had brought. We spent a lot of time talking about our relationship and how we had seen God blessing it all along the way. While we were hiking Fort Mountain we heard a storm blowing in and it started to rain on us. We sprinted the entire way down the mountain because we both had our cameras with us and did not want to get caught in the rain with them. We put our cameras in the car, took our shoes off, and went out to a deck that overlooked the Blue Ridge Mountains. As we were sitting there in the rain Matthew pulled a little box out of his pocket and asked me to marry him. I did not even know that he had asked Papa yet! I was in complete shock, I am pretty sure it took me a good 30-45 seconds to answer him.

I later found out that on our drive from North Carolina to Georgia the ring was in Matthew’s backpack. I had gotten cold on the drive and had opened his backpack to get his sweatshirt out and Matt now tells me that he was really nervous because I opened the pocket with the ring in it! Thankfully I did not see the ring. During that same trip to Georgia we also received word that Matthew was being assigned to a new base in Anchorage, Alaska. The plans were made to get married in Texas on October 25 and leave to move to Alaska on October 26. It was a very eventful and life changing Georgia vacation!

To celebrate 3 years, we went to eat at Lone Star Steakhouse. It was delicious! Sorry for the very poor quality pictures...I used my iPhone to take them.

+1 Nephew

2011-10-27T01:25:00.000-08:00

We have added another nephew to our list! Matt's brother, John and his wife Deb, had a little baby boy Wednesday morning at 5:22am. His name is Orson Jack. He was 7lbs 13oz (I think that was the exact weight) and 18 inches long. Mom and baby are both doing great! And Matt and I get to go meet him in about 3 weeks! We are so excited to meet this new little guy!

Here are a couple of pictures of John and his new son.

What a proud dad! I can't wait to see him and Deb be parents!

Beard Please!!

2011-10-25T16:02:00.000-08:00

I love bread. It is probably my favorite food. I like banana bread, pumpkin bread, sour dough bread, french bread, rosemary bread, pumpernickel bread, beer bread....rye bread is the only kind of bread that I have found that I do not like. I had asked for a bread maker for thanksmas. But then, Matthew surprised me with a bread maker for our anniversary!! I am sooo excited. I have a loaf in the bread maker right now to try it out for the first time.

I decided to try the sweet bread recipe from the cookbook that came with the bread-maker.

The long version of bread only takes 2 hours and 20 minutes! And you can do an express version that only takes 58 minutes. This is amazing because then when I have procrastinated and have lots left to do to get dinner ready, I can just throw the ingredients in the bread-maker and walk away and still have fresh/hot bread for dinner!

Annie Get Your Gun

2011-10-23T20:15:00.000-08:00

A couple of weeks ago, Matthew took me out to shoot my 12 gauge shot gun that he bought for me a couple of years ago for Christmas. The last time he took me out was a few weeks after he got it for me. Since it was January here, it was about -10 degrees outside, and needless to say, I shot the gun once and the kick hurt my shoulder so badly (because I was sooo cold), that I got in the truck and didn't want to shoot it ever again! But Matthew was going to go shooting with a couple of his buddies and since I was off, I wanted to go too (just to hang out with Matt). They were shooting clays...so I thought I'd join in for a couple of shots and try shooting the 12 gauge one more time. It ended up being a blast, because I actually hit the clay 4-5 times! I told Matt I'd for sure be up for more shooting :) And Matt has happy to know that I would actually be able to hit something with the gun if I ever have to shoot it.

Guilty. Pleasures.

2011-10-23T20:04:00.001-08:00

Growing up I didn't even like Root Beer. In fact, I wouldn't drink it at all. But recently, my friend Jen, brought over stuff to make Root Beer floats and I decided to try it again...and LOVED it! So, lately I have been a little addicted to them :)

These are Matt's guilty pleasure. Matt loves tapatio. He eats it on nearly everything.

And the other day he discovered these tapatio Doritos.

We have discovered together that we really enjoy going to a good play together. Fiddler on the Roof is in town right now. I had never heard the story or seen the movie (I'd heard OF it...just never seen it). So, Matt wanted to take me to see it. It turned out to be a fabulous show. We both thoroughly enjoyed it! And before the show we also tried a new Thai food place. Yuummm, definitely the best Thai food we've found in Anchorage so far!

10 Ways to Encourage

2011-10-15T20:23:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine who has also been dealing with miscarriage sent me a link to the blog of a lady who has had multiple miscarriages and this list was on the side of her blog, so I thought I would share. I am sure that applies to any kind of lose, not only in miscarriage.

10 Ways to Encourage Someone Who Has Had a Miscarriage

1. Fill her arms with something to hold.

2. Initiate communication, "How are you today?" However, don't push conversation, she'll talk if she wants/needs to.

3. Don't say, "I know how you feel."

4. Listen, even if what she has to say is something she has said a hundred times.

5. Always use the name of her child.

6. When words fail, share silence or a hug.

7. Always remember special days with a note or gift (mother's day, birthday, day the child passed)

8. Remember, you can always give your Presence & Prayer.

9. Give Kleenex, a CD, book, or personalized piece of jewelry with the child's name engraved.

10. Don't use the phrases "Everything is going to be ok" or "God just must have a different plan for you." They hurt more than they help.

Ready for Snow

2011-10-09T21:34:00.003-08:00

I am ready for snow in the city! Snow has made it's debut on the mountaintops but hasn't made it to the streets of the city yet. But, I imagine that it will be on my front porch before I know it.....and I can't wait! I love the snow! And am so excited about winter being almost here :)

Happy Birthday Hailey Brooklyn!

2011-10-08T22:22:00.000-08:00

Kate and Aaron ready to witness the Dora the Explorer pinata extravaganza.

These pictures are really out of order. This is the picture of Ryan helping smash the pinata the rest of the way (after the little girls were done hitting it and were unable to bust it open).

The birthday girl and her family :)

Uncle Matt helping Hailey get the candy box open.

Awwwww :)

Courtney and sweet Aiden. Aiden partying it up at only 2 weeks old!

Happy 3rd birthday, Hailey!

Eli looks like he may be about to join Aiden in his nap...the joys of being a new dad :)

Opening birthday presents!

Hailey wanted everyone to try on her new princess crown.

Even Uncle Matt!

The birthday girls parents!

Sorry your eyes are kind of closed, Kate! I didn't notice it when I took the picture....but it's the only one I had of you guys...so I wanted to post it anyway!

Aiden sporting his adorable purple and gray jacket. Love it.

Aaron and baby Lily. She's growing up sooo fast!

Lily and Lincoln. Too cute.

Aiden sleeping...again :)

Hailey letting us know how old she is!

Jen and Hailey

Hailey trying to get to the candy!

Getting a little help from mommy.

And a little help from daddy.

We are so blessed to be a part of this community of people. Living way up here in Alaska we so often miss out on precious milestones in the lives of all of our little nieces and nephews. So, we are so thankful to have friend that let us be the aunt and uncle to their little girl Hailey (since all her aunts and uncles are also far away!). Happy 3rd birthday, Hailey!! We love you!

Pandemic

2011-10-02T23:51:00.002-08:00

A few weeks ago Kenny and Emma invited us over and after dinner they introduced us to a new board game called, Pandemic. It is a game where all the players are on a team together and you are all playing against the board game. This was a perfect game for the four of us....as it helps us not get so competitive against each other :) We are slightly addicted.

Quick Trip

2011-09-27T11:26:00.000-08:00

Haha. This was a pretty typical pose for these two. Chris being goofy and Heather trying to convince him to smile for real for just ONE picture! :)

A bald eagle that we saw just as we were getting started with this sea life/glacier cruise.

I love how the water is so green/blue in some areas!!

Since Matthew and I already lived in Alaska when Heather and Chris met, we never really got a chance to get to know each other's husbands...so this has been a really fun trip to get to know them better!

We saw tons of dall porpoises! They swim so fast so they are really tough to catch on camera!

Papa trying to keep warm :)

Mama and Papa. They've been married for almost 35 years and raised 10 children. They are amazing parents and I am so blessed to have been raised by them. Thank you for coming to visit!!

The whole group in front of the glacier...although you can't see the glacier in the background :)

So glad these two guys have joined out family :)

The view from the chalet that we stayed at in Moose Pass. There was a jacuzzi on the deck too!

We drove through a 2.5 mile tunnel to get to Whittier, AK and while we were there we ate at Orca Cafe.

Then we drove back north to Girdwood and ate at Double Musky and stayed at Alyeska hotel.

The Orca Cafe.

Celebrating 26 Years

2011-09-26T19:55:00.000-08:00

Matt really likes strawberry rhubarb pie! So, Mama and I made him one for his birthday. I forgot to take a pictures post cooking it...but it was delicious. Last year I wanted to make him one of these for his birthday, but I could not find ANY rhubarb at ANY stores here in Eagle River or Anchorage. Thus, I didn't get to make him one last year. Thankfully this year my friend Emily gave me a lot of fresh rhubarb this summer and I froze a lot of it to use all winter.

We also went to eat at Glacier Brew House for Matthew's birthday.

Hailey helped Matt blow out his one birthday candle :)

We then took a walk down at Earthquake park while we waited for Chris and Heather's flight to get in.

The first picture everyone was a little too sullen...so I had to help them out and make them laugh! :)

2011-09-23T13:59:00.001-08:00

I love the colors of fall! Fall here in Alaska tends to be rather short. The leaves change very quickly and then fall not long after they change. But I love every second of the beautiful colors. I love the crispness of the air. The smells of fall. The need for fires in the fire place. Wearing sweatshirts and hats. Love it.

My parents are in town and my sister and brother-in-law get in town tonight!

So, I will post pictures of our their trip next week!

Happy Birthday, Matthew!

2011-09-22T13:52:00.000-08:00

It is amazing to me how quickly time goes by! I have gotten to celebrate 4 birthday's with Matthew already. What a blessing he is in my life. This year has had its ups and downs, but God has brought us through them all and is teaching us to rely on Him more.

We didn't do too much for Matt's birthday yet because he is working nights right now and then had appointments all day. But, this weekend we are going to go to Seward, AK with my parents and my sister and brother-in-law. We are going to go on a sea life cruise and stay in a chalet down there for the weekend! Tomorrow night we are going to go eat at Glacier Brew House to celebrate as well!

Happy Birthday, Matthew! I love being your wife and I love sharing this life with you!

Faith Like a Child

2011-09-07T14:41:00.001-08:00

Back in July when Matt and I found out we were pregnant, we video chatted with our friends Ryan, Jen and their daughter, Hailey. We told them that we were pregnant. To explain it to Hailey, Jen told her that I had a baby in my tummy. Today Jen told me that the other day Hailey asked her about the baby in my tummy (Hailey is 2 years old, I cannot believe she even remembered!!). Jen told her that I did not have a baby in my tummy anymore, and Hailey said, "but on the phone Aunt Jo Jo had a baby in her tummy".... Jen was trying to explain to Hailey that we lost the baby. And Hailey asked if Uncle Matt took the baby :) Jen then told her that the baby was in heaven with God. And Hailey immediately asked if Jesus was holding the baby. Jen told her that He absolutely was. I was so thankful that Jen shared this story with me. It was so sweet and I just wanted to share. I also hope that Tyler is holding Matthew and my two sweet babies there in heaven.

"Yes, and I will continue to rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and the help given by the Spirit of Jesus Christ, what has happened to me will turn out for my deliverance. I will eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death." -Philippians 1:18a-20

Weekend Hunt

2011-09-06T10:51:00.000-08:00

We got up at 3:15am to head out for the hunting trip. We met up with Andy and Nic (two guys that Matthew works with) and drove about 3 hours north to Eureka. We got to see this gorgeous sun rise on the way. Although, I slept most of the way because I got home from work around 1:00am....so I'd only had a couple of hours of sleep :)

Once we got off the main road the guys would stop every mile or so and look for moose/caribou.

I, however, stayed in the jeep mostly because I was freezing!! I was inside my sleeping back in the jeep most of the morning because the heater in the jeep wasn't working that great.

At this point we had driven about 15-16 miles back into the tundra....and Matt's jeep got stuck. Andy and Nic were both on 4-wheelers and attempted to pull him out with no success. We then spent about two hours using Matt's jack to jack the jeep up and gathered branches and brush to put underneath the tires to try to get the jeep out of the deep mud a bit.

The jeep almost tipped over a couple of times while jacking it up because it was so off balance because the right tires were buried so deep! But we did finally get it out after about 2.5 hours of work.

The first morning we awoke to frost everywhere! It was rather cold that first night!

Just a little Alaskan traffic jam....

We ate lots of Mountain House meals. Yummmmm :)

Getting the caribou ready to transport it out of wilderness into our freezers :) We were about 40 miles back in the tundra at this point.

All in all it was a great trip. Matt and I had a blast hanging out and we are very excited to eat some caribou meat. I will definitely go hunting with Matt again if I get the chance!

God is about God

2011-08-29T17:57:00.001-08:00

I was listening to a podcast a couple of weeks ago. The podcast was all about that fact that I am not the point in this universe. I have to remember that God is the point. God is about God. God has redeemed me which frees me up be about God.When I am the point, I am easily angered and bothered by others and get frustrated when things don't go my way. When I pretend to be stronger than I am, I am giving Satan a foothold that he will take advantage of. I want you to know that I am weak. That I am not doing this. I am not the one that is supplying the joy and am not the one that helps me to keep on hoping....but that it is only God working in me. The entire purpose of me being here on this earth is for the glory of God. And if His glory is made complete by my suffering, than I will find joy in suffering. In a previous post I was talking about God granting me "the desires of my heart"....well, although Matthew and I do long to have children....more than that, we long to be made more like Christ and we long to bring glory to God. My prayer is that God will use me for his glory by giving me a joy and a hope that is seen in me by those around me. And, that He will continue to reveal more of himself to me that I might rejoice in the fact that he is enough for me even in these trials. I was created for HIS glory. So, although I falter every day and although I want to cry out in anger many days.....I am reminded:

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted....Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled." ~Matthew 5:3-6

"...whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made" -Isaiah 43:7

Landon, Whitney and Peyton Jo

2011-08-10T23:41:00.000-08:00

Landon, Whitney and Peyton came to visit for 8 days! We had such a great time with them. We are so blessed that so many of our family members have been able to come up to visit us (and some of them even twice) since we've lived here. I absolutely loved getting to be Peyton's only aunt around (so that I could monopolize all her time), and it is always so wonderful to hang out with Landon and Whitney. Since Matthew and I moved up here the day after we got married, it is always fun to hang out with family and get to know each other better as couples.

Like the title of the blog...Finding Hope...

2011-08-10T13:35:00.002-08:00

After miscarrying baby #2 things seem so odd. I don't know how to remain hopeful and trust that God will answer our prayers and provide the desires of our heart, and still remain realistic and realize that it may not be in God's plan for Matthew and I to have our own children. How do I remain hopeful, but not wear myself out with hope and then heartbreak over and over again? I do not know that answer to this question right now. All I know is that right now I have to keep on hoping even though there is a huge part of me that is fearful. I know that fear in not of God, and I pray that God will help me to trust Him and to know that he will provide all that I need even if he does not provide a healthy pregnancy for Matthew and me.

Here is the adorable little hat that Mama bought for little baby Cornett (before we miscarried of course):

Thank you, Mama!
We absolutely love it and cannot wait for a little Cornett to wear it one day!

"I will exalt you, my God the King; I will praise your name for ever and ever. Every day I will praise you and extol your name. Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom...I will meditate on your wonderful works. They will tell of the power of your awesome works, and I will proclaim your great deeds....the Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. The Lord is good to all; he has compassion on all he has made...the Lord is faithful to all his promises and loving toward all he has made. The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them. The Lord watches over all who love him....my mouth will speak in praise of the Lord. Let every creature praise his holy name for ever and ever." -Psalm 145

8 Flowers for 8 Days

2011-06-25T16:12:00.000-08:00

My thoughtful husband. It is crazy how each time he is gone it is different. Sometimes the short little stints when he is gone are harder then the deployments. Especially if they are unexpected. So, Monday before last Matt came home from work and told me that he was leaving the next morning and that he would be gone until July. Him being gone this time was really tough for the first few days because I had NO time to mentally and emotionally prepare for it. I have decided that I highly dislike him being gone. I dislike it no matter how long it is for. But, when I don't have time to prepare, it can make it harder. So, my very sweet husband knew that I was missing him like crazy. When I arrived home from running around and photo shoots yesterday, I found these lovely things (along with a large box of chocolates) on my doorstep. He gave be eight roses for the eight more days that it would be until he came home. I love this guy. He knows exactly what to do to make me smile. AND, he is a Godly leader, a patient husband and my best friend. I am so thankful that God chose me to be his wife.

Off Road Camping Trip

2011-06-21T17:32:00.000-08:00

One weekend while Stetson and Katy were here we went off roading and camped overnight out on the trail. It was so a blast! Here is Matt and my tent where we camped.

Averi trying to steal Matt's coffee.

Devin and Sarah borrowed a 4-wheeler from some friends of Brian and Amanda's since Devin's jeep in not finished yet, and we all took turns riding it.

On the trail.

We had amazing 360 views the whole way!

Ryan got a little bit stuck in the mud. But, as you can see, no one was upset about it....because after all, that is the reason the guys go out....to get stuck and pull each other out of the mud!

We are so blessed to live here. We have some amazing friends from our small group at church. We do miss our families terribly and we look forward to moving back to the lower 48 and getting to be involved in our families lives on a more regular basis. But for now, God has blessed us richly where we are.

Camping/Fishing/Hiking - Stetson and Katy

2011-06-21T16:03:00.000-08:00

The first day they were here we hiked Mt. Badly. I would guess that I have made that hike between 25-30 times since I have lived in Alaska. It is such a great hike because it is only about a 10-15 minute drive from my house and the hike only takes about 1-1 1/2 to finish. Plus, the view from the top is incredible!!

We then drove down south to the Kenai River and went fishing and camping. Although. We did not catch a single fish! We didn't even get any bites. We didn't even see anyone else catch any fish. It was quite ridiculous! But, we had fun anyway :)

I don't have any pictures of me and Matt...they were on Sarah's camera...but I'll try to get them from her sometime and post them :)

Hiking and Boating in Mat

2011-06-18T01:51:00.002-08:00

Mixer Please!

2011-05-10T13:07:00.000-08:00

The other day there was a coupon for a kitchen aid mixer. I have been wanting one for a while now and was so excited to get it. I have never owned a mixer before. I have always just used my big African wooden spoons to mix, which are great! But I do have to say that I absolutely love having this mixer now. I can put the ingredients in and while they are being mixed together I can walk away and do other things! Amazing :)

The first thing I made was a Cream Cheese Lemon Coffee Cake. Yuuummmm!!!

Camping

2011-05-09T12:25:00.000-08:00

This last weekend Matt and I went camping. We have been camping a lot together, but never gone just the two of us. It was a lot of fun. We did a lot of sitting around the campfire reading, playing cards, and we went off-roading one afternoon. We had a great time! We are so excited about camping all summer with all of our friends up here and the friends/family that come to visit!

HOME!!!

2011-04-23T21:00:00.001-08:00

He should be home in about 36 hours!! I am beyond excited!!!

Thunder Bird Falls Hike

2011-04-12T21:13:00.000-08:00

Although it was very icy at times, we had a fabulous time hiking. Nicki and her two girls, Mazie and Ellie, went. Along with Amanda and her two girls, Cadence and Averi. As well as Courtney and Marianke. It was lovely to get out and enjoy the sunny weather today.

Cadence and Ellie loved walking hand in hand.

Nicki and Amanda helping their girls get over the super icy parts.

Nicki and sweet Mazie.

Averi saying "cheese"

Courtney and Averi. Courtney is going to be such a great mom!

The whole group :)

Cadence, Ellie and Averi

Amanda stripping the girls down after letting them go jumping in the mud puddles.

Ellie getting a little drink :) She was using a leaf to dip into the mud puddle and then licking the water off the leaf. I couldn't help but take some pictures. The ER nurse in me says, "ahhh, it will build up her immune system" :)

Nicki helping Ellie get her wet shoes and socks off.

Averi saying "cheese" again.

Hiking Baldy

2011-04-12T01:08:00.000-08:00

We have been itching to get out and do some hiking. It continues to snow a lot of days here. Most of the snow in the city has melted....but the mountains are still covered in snow. We decided to get out there and hike Mt. Baldy even though it is still very snowy and even pretty icy in a lot of areas. One day Sarah and I went with some of our friends Dan and Nicki and their two adorable daughters, Ellie and Mazie (and Dan's cousin, Troy). That day I had forgotten my hiking stick so I (and Nicki, Ellie, and Mazie) did not go all the way to the top. If I don't have my hiking stick or Matthew I never go to the top of Baldy because it is very steep towards the top. In the winter it is very slick and icy and in the summer there are lots of very loose rocks. Then, Sarah and I went and hiked Mt. Baldy a second time with our friend Amanda. This time I had my hiking stick so I made it all the way to the top :) It was gorgeous. It is always so refreshing to get out and hike and enjoy the outdoors.

Sarah, Amanda and I celebrating getting to the top! :)

The view of Anchorage and Eagle River from the top.

Sarah and Amanda

Me and Amanda

Me and Sarah

Mazie Mae :)

Nicki and Ellie

Sarah hiking Mt. Baldy in the snow....wearing capris :)

Mazie, Nicki and Sarah

Mazie, Nicki and me

I am so blessed to have so many great friends up here to surround me and hang out with me while Matthew is gone. I miss him so terribly. I am so ready for him to be home. Can't wait!!! But, in the mean time I am so thankful for everyone here who has been taking care of me while he's been gone! Hopefully he'll be home in two or three weeks :)

Hungry

2011-04-09T01:02:00.000-08:00

Since Tyler's death I have not felt "hungry" for God's word, except when I am down and when I am searching for comfort in His word. But I have not had a desire to just search His word to know Him more. That is, until the last few weeks. As most of you know, Matthew and I miscarried our baby back in late January. Although at the time the grief was not terrible or unbearable, over the last couple of months God has slowly worked in my heart to have a new desire to know Him again because of the pain of this loss. A desire to truly understand and know the powerful and sovereign God that I serve. I had been very content. Happy. Fine. Okay. And lacking desire to be nearer to the God. Thankfully, God did not allow me to stay that way. He does not want me to be luke warm in my faith. He desires that I passionately seek after Him and seek to know Him more. So often I rely on Matthew for my comfort rather than God. I am married to an amazing man. A man who is so compassionate, patient and kind. He is so good at comforting me and loving me that I tend to run to him instead of God. Since the miscarriage happened while Matt was gone, (Matt did get to come home for a few days right afterwards) I have been unable to rely on him as much for my comfort, and in turn God has reminded me that he is my comforter. And, God has renewed my desire to seek him and know his truth just for the sake of knowing him and loving him rather than only for the sake of finding comfort.

Sweet Potato Moose Soup

2011-04-07T00:59:00.000-08:00

I had some moose meat thawed out that I needed to use and was really craving some sweet potatoes. So, I googled those ingredients and this is the recipe that came up (I changed it a little bit).

1 lb moose meat (or ground beef)

4 sweet potatoes, cooked (pureed or chunks)

2 cans chicken broth

1 can coconut milk

1 yellow onion, chopped

3 cloves garlic

2 cups celery, chopped

salt and pepper to taste

Saute onion, garlic, and celery (using olive oil). Add ground beef, cook until beef is done. Put in stock pot and add chicken broth, coconut milk and sweet potatoes. (and salt and pepper to taste). Bring to boil and let simmer for 30 minutes to 1 hour.

I cooked brown rice and served this over brown rice, but you can also eat it by itself. i thought it turned out great! I will definitely be making this again!

I didn't take a picture of the final product because it didn't look that appetizing :)

Maybe Not :)

2011-03-31T09:04:00.001-08:00

Sooo...about spring. It may not be coming as soon as I thought. :) Because I woke up to this this morning. But, I do LOVE the snow! So, as much as I am ready for warm weather, camping trips, fishing, hiking, barbeque's, and Matt to be home....I do love to see fresh snow on the ground. It is just so perfect and clean and beautiful. Just like we are in God's sight when we accept the grace of Jesus Christ!

Spring is Springing

2011-03-29T22:51:00.001-08:00

Even my car has noticed that spring is coming. My car is a great winter car. It has lots of really nice features that make winter driving so much better. But, I have found that even though she was made to be great in cold, she really she likes the warm weather better. In the winter she was only getting about 22 miles per gallon. But already with the temperatures being in the high 30's and low 40's she is now getting 26 miles per gallon. I am sure she will continue to improve her miles per gallon average as the temps continue to get warmer :)

Congratulations!

2011-03-29T13:36:00.001-08:00

I have two sisters-in-law expecting baby's this fall!

Zach and Kara are expecting another little addition to their family in late August. As well as they are adopting a baby from Africa in May! So they are expanding by two again this summer :)

And then, John and Deb (Matt's brother and his wife) are expecting their first baby in October!

Congrats to both families!

Indoor Luau in Alaska :)

2011-03-27T15:44:00.001-08:00

Sarah and Averi

Hailey and Cadence lounging on the beach chair :)

Amber, Andrew and Tami

Amanda and Sarah

Brent and Liz

Ryan and Devin

Hailey and Jen

Brian and Averi

Amber and Tami learning to hula dance

Cameronn watching while Amanda and Sarah laugh at themselves attempting to hula.

Hillary, Shiloh and Levi

Ginna, Amanda Ninette, Jen, Cameronn, Me and Sarah

Ginna, Tyler, and little baby Van Zandt!! :)

Devin and Sarah

The Cook family

Me and Liz

Cole and Averi

Willow/Fairbanks

2011-03-18T10:34:00.004-08:00

This last weekend Gini, Shelley, Sarah, Devin and I drove to Fairbanks and back. This first night we drove to Willow and stayed at a public use cabin there. It was right on the edge of a frozen lake and we could see the mountains off in the distance. We saw a moose out on the lake and got to go sledding. Then the next day we packed up and drove 5 more hours to Fairbanks. There we stayed in a public use cabin about 30 miles south of Fairbanks. It was right on the edge of a frozen river. The second cabin was REALLY small. It was actually only supposed to sleep 3 people...but we all just piled in. :) While we were there we also went to the Chena Hot Springs. It was very cool to be in a natural hot springs pool with snow all around the edges of the pool. While there we also visited North Pole. There were still lots of things Christmas around. We took some pictures by the ice sculptures and ate at the Elf's Den (not the best food in the world). We had such a great time just seeing lots of moose, snowshoeing, sitting by the fire and playing card games (and doing lots of driving!!). We all got to know one another ~~a little to~~o really well :)

Devin and Sarah

Sledding!!

We ate at Glacier Brewhouse. Yummmm!

Gini wearing Matthew's ginormous ski gloves.

The Elf's Den

Shelley, Gini, me, Devin and Sarah sitting in an ice sculpture of Santa's sleigh.

Cross Country Skiing/Shelley's 19th Birthday

2011-03-12T17:23:00.002-09:00

Gini and Shelley are here visiting for 9 days! It's great to have them here! the day after they got here was Shelley's 19th birthday. So, we took her cross country skiing for her first time. It ended up being really icy...which makes it kind of tough to learn to ski. Both Gini and Shelley have downhill skied all their lives...but cross country skiing is an entirely different thing! Sarah Rafeedie went with us...and even though it was icy and we all had lots of falls, but had a GREAT time :)

By about 20 minutes into the ski everyone was shedding their coats...

so I got to be the pack horse and carry them :)

I love Shelley's smile in this one. She looks a lot like Tyler in this one. I don't think I've ever thought before that she looked like him...but I see it in this picture.

A little mayhem on the trail :)

Skype

2011-03-07T21:51:00.000-09:00

I am very thankful for skype :) It is amazing how much just being able to see Matthew on a video helps me to not miss him so much. Even if the video does look like an episode of cops due to Matthew's face being so blurry that I can barely tell that it is, in fact, for sure my husband! I am so thankful for the modern technology that helps me to stay connected to my husband while he is gone.

Flowers From Matthew

2011-02-22T23:56:00.000-09:00

Matthew originally wanted to surprise me with flowers on Valentine's Day. But....I messed up his plans because I would not make a definite decision about what city in Texas I would be in on February 14. So, he cancelled the order. Then, today I had a lovely surprise show up at my front door. Matthew is so thoughtful! He is the love of my life and I am so thankful for him! Can't wait for him to get home :)

Cross Country Skiing

2011-02-22T23:51:00.002-09:00

I got to go cross country skiing for my first time this weekend. I went with Brian and Amanda and their two daughters, Tyler and Ginna, and Sarah. We had a great time. I always thought that cross country skiing would be tiring and no fun at all. But I am happy to say I was wrong!!

Visit to Texas in Pictures

2011-02-22T22:26:00.002-09:00

A Few More Videos

2011-02-15T19:14:00.002-09:00

I just had to post these to keep those who are so far away (like Matt) up to date :) It is soo hard to describe Colton and Jolie's personalities and it is actually rather difficult to catch on video too. Especially Colton. He is a little mover! He has such a great personality. He is so happy and tenderhearted. He absolutely adores his little sister. We have been having to keep a close eye on him. Today he was applying some chap-stick to Jolie's lips, feeding her some spinach, offering her some of his peanut butter sandwich, picking her up off the coach, and touching her face when she began to cry. Jolie is a sweetheart. She is so laid back and so far is such a good baby! She is quite precious. I definitely see why Colton loves her so much :)

Video For the Fam

2011-02-14T18:14:00.007-09:00

Here are a few videos for those family members who haven't gotten to come see Jolie yet.

These videos are kind of long and probably rather boring for non family members, but I am sure the aunts and uncles will enjoy them!

Madeleine Jolie

2011-02-14T10:53:00.003-09:00

They are planning to call her Jolie...although Papa has started calling her Madie J :)

This is Nate and Colton playing with some trucks in the labor and delivery room waiting for Jolie to arrive!

Jolie's adorable little feet just after delivery.

Jolie about to grab her dad's hand while the nurse is checking up on her.

Colton getting a little mom time just after Jolie arrived.

The whole family! :)

Aunt Heather with sweet Madie J.

Just look at those precious little lips. She couldn't be any sweeter.

Uncle Chris and Aunt Heather talking to Jolie.

Mamanita and Colton.

Nate shielding Jolie's eyes from the bright lights. So sweet!

Colton is so excited to be a big brother! Look at that tongue sticking out.

Colton holding Jolie's little hand.

Such a proud big brother!

Colton and Heather taking a little break from all the action.

Maddie J sleeping through the blood draw :) Such a trooper.

Jolie and my first picture together!

Uncle Ted stopped by for a quick visit to hold sweet Jolie.

Aunt Whitney getting to hold her for the first time.

Mamanita with sweet Peyton who came to meet her new cousin, Jolie.

Peyton hanging out with Aunt Terah.

Aunt Heather holding sweet Peyton some more.

She likes to have her fingers near to her mouth it seems.

Peyton meeting her new cousin for the first time. Peyton is a girl full of smiles. This picture does not reflect her excitement at meeting her new cousin!

Mamanita helping Colton hold his little sister.

Snow Day!!

2011-02-01T09:52:00.004-09:00

Your Love is Strong

2011-01-27T20:29:00.003-09:00

Tonight I went to the Trinity Christian High School talent show with my family. Trinity is the school that my younger siblings attend here in Lubbock, TX and it is spirit week at their school so there are lots of activities to attend and this was on of them. Man, that school has some very talented musicians! One of the kids played and sang a song called "Your Love is Strong" by Jon Foreman. I am sure some of you have heard it, but I had not. It really struck me, so I thought I would share the lyrics. And if you get a chance you should listen to the song.

Heavenly Father
You always amaze me, Let your kingdom come
In my world and in my life, You give me the food I need
To live through the day, And forgive me as I forgive
The people that wronged me, Lead me far from temptation
Deliver me from the evil one, I look out the window
the birds are composing, Not a note is out of tune
Or out of place, I look at the meadow
And stare at the flowers, Better dressed then any girl
On her wedding day, So why do I worry?
Why do I freak out, God knows what I need
You know what I need
Your love is
Your love is
Your love is strong
The kingdom of the heavens, Is now advancing
Invade my heart, Invade this broke town
The kingdom of the heavens, Is buried treasure
Will you sell yourself, to buy the one you've found?
Two things you told me, That you are strong
And you love me, Yes, you love me.

Definitely lyrics that speak deep into the depths of my soul during this time in my life.

They are just what I needed to hear.

“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” ~Deuteronomy 31:8

Tyler

2010-12-21T12:05:00.001-09:00

Today it has been four years.

I just now (December 1, 2011) found this post that I apparently started writing on December 21, 2010. The very short above sentence is as far as I got that day....some days I remain in shock that he is really gone and there are just now words....

Winter Wonderland

2010-12-17T16:56:00.003-09:00

I get to live in this winter wonderland everyday! Although the last week the temps have been SUPER cold, it is still an amazing place to live.

"Those who know your name trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you." ~Psalm 9:10

2010-12-13T16:32:00.003-09:00

I really wanted to have some pictures taken of us in the snow before Matt deploys.

So, our good friend Sarah Rafeedie took a few for us!

You can see more pictures that the two of us have taken at: kairosphotograph.blogspot.com and sojournerphotography.blogspot.com.

Skhoop Skirt

2010-12-13T00:12:00.003-09:00

If only this were not so expensive!! There are a few girls from work that I have seen wearing this skirt. It is perfect for these Alaskan winters. It has a zipper all the way up one side, so you can just zip it on over your regular clothes and then zip it off when you get to the warmth of the indoors. It is a coat for your legs. Amazing. However, they are quite pricey. So, I will just have to wait until they go down in price or I can find one on ebay I guess. But hey. A girl can dream about warm skirts that look like sleeping bags can't she?!